Adelle 5 months

Dearest Girl,

This month you've rolled over from your back onto your side. That was fine for a few days, but now you're starting to get a bit frustrated that you can't get all the way over. Poor little thing. I cheated and helped you once and your little face lit up so bright! Just recently you started reaching out to touch my face (oh the sweetness of that!), my tea cup (it's not too hot), and whatever I'm eating. You touch the food, but don't pick it up yet. We've still got another month before you're ready for anything other than breastmilk.

Whoa you look like your Papa Graham here!

When you smile, you smile really big. The more excited you are the wider you open your mouth. It's really pretty cute. You're laughing more often which is the absolute joy of all joys. Overall, you are a very happy baby. You have, however, just discovered your mad voice--or shall I say squeal? You are practicing how to tell me "I don't like that!" Or "Mama, get here now!" At this point it makes me laugh. Check back with me on that in a few months though!

You are starting to understand that you are separate from me. When I try to put you down now you fuss, whereas before you didn't seem to mind. You are also discovering how to throw things. The other day while driving I saw a toy being ejected from your seat and flying across the car.

Right now you are in your crib chatting to yourself. Most of the time at night after our bedtime routine I lay you down and you put yourself to sleep. But first you have yourself a good chat. On the nights you need a little help to sleep, you rarely take more than a few minutes to doze off once I come back into the room. At the beginning of this month it wasn't getting to sleep you had a problem with--it was staying asleep. Just over the past few days though you seem to be settling back down again (fingers crossed!!).

This picture illustrates what the end of this month was like for you--grabbing EVERYthing!

Speaking of bedtime, when you get overly tired you not only get super chatty, but you become downright delirious! You start to giggle and get silly sometimes. You definitely take that from me. I can remember many times as a child bouncing off the walls and then crashing. We have our little nightly routine and I sing you a special song. As soon as I begin to sing you stop mid-gurgle and smile as if to say "That's nice, Mama." Then you go right back into your own stories telling me about all of the things you learned that day.

Your eyes are starting to change from slate blue to a lighter shade. There are still moments I look into those eyes and think "Is this really happening? Is this really my daughter?" From the moment I knew you were growing in my belly till now, well, it all seems like a dream. Today at the beach we saw a little two year old girl toddling around and I imagined you being that age. I can't think of the words to tell you the way that made my heart feel. It was a jumble of excitement and sadness, wonderment and  nostalgia, and everything in between. I like you so much right now and I'm so looking forward to getting to know you better, but I don't want it to go too fast either!

Each day brings something new from you, and from week to week you seem like a different kid. Even while I take a few weeks to write this, so much has changed! All my life I wanted to grow up fast, and I looked to the next thing and the next, but now I want everything to slow down. I know this is something all parents feel. And I know time don't stop for nobody, baby. Your Dad said something the other day after having got you to giggle like a madwoman. He said "I'll never get that moment back, so I'm going to stop to enjoy as much as I can." He's a smart one that Daddy of yours.

Now in to our next month....where we start solids and who knows what other treats. It's all so much fun that every morning when you wake me up I give you a big smile to let you know how happy I am to see you. If there's one thing you carry in your heart from this part of your life, I hope it's that happiness.

All my love, Mama