At one point in my life I would have freaked out about being alone on a Saturday night. Or any night for that matter. I hated being alone. Dreaded it. I loathed solitude. I spat in the face of Loneliness.
There was a time that I fought Loneliness like a tenacious little bulldog nipping at her heels trying to keep her away. Loneliness just held on and stood firm. I fought and I fought until finally I gave in and allowed her to stay. She stayed with me a good long time patiently tolerating my resentment until finally I realized She had become a part of my life I had become accustomed to. After some time I even came to call Loneliness 'friend' and actually look forward to her company.
I am so grateful to have found Paul. Beyond grateful. But truthfully, there are times I miss my old friend. I miss Miss Lonely. I really came to appreciate her. She has a quiet beauty and grace about her that no other has. She is a part of me and I need Her in my life. We like to take baths together, write together (she's even helping me edit this now), laugh together, and cook together. We do things together I'd never let anyone else see me do. No matter how long it's been, when we get together it's just like old times.
Loneliness has a bad rap. To a lot of people she's the 'bad' girl around town. But really she's just doing her job-keeping us all in check, reminding us about how important it is to be intimate with one another-and with ourselves. Some would deny her. Some admonish her. Some even dare to scorn her and spit in her face as I once did. We've all turned our backs on her at one time or another.
There was a time that I fought Loneliness like a tenacious little bulldog nipping at her heels trying to keep her away. Loneliness just held on and stood firm. I fought and I fought until finally I gave in and allowed her to stay. She stayed with me a good long time patiently tolerating my resentment until finally I realized She had become a part of my life I had become accustomed to. After some time I even came to call Loneliness 'friend' and actually look forward to her company.
I am so grateful to have found Paul. Beyond grateful. But truthfully, there are times I miss my old friend. I miss Miss Lonely. I really came to appreciate her. She has a quiet beauty and grace about her that no other has. She is a part of me and I need Her in my life. We like to take baths together, write together (she's even helping me edit this now), laugh together, and cook together. We do things together I'd never let anyone else see me do. No matter how long it's been, when we get together it's just like old times.
Loneliness has a bad rap. To a lot of people she's the 'bad' girl around town. But really she's just doing her job-keeping us all in check, reminding us about how important it is to be intimate with one another-and with ourselves. Some would deny her. Some admonish her. Some even dare to scorn her and spit in her face as I once did. We've all turned our backs on her at one time or another.
Here I am all alone on a Saturday night. I am so grateful for the fullness of my life and for the self-love I've fostered so that Loneliness isn't any longer a constant presence. I am happy to say that I am blessed enough to either take or leave Her as I please. I don't think she's offended by that. On the contrary, I think she's just glad someone gets her.
Keep your eyes open and I think you'll see she's all around. For some reason during the holidays she's extra busy. If you see her in someone's eyes, give her a little break and take the time to keep someone company for a bit. I'm sure they'd appreciate it. Loneliness can be welcomed in small doses, but after a while she can get to be a little much.
